Sunday, August 31, 2008

How to read the entire Quran in Ramadan...

Since Ramadhan is right around the corner, I decided that I will attempt to read the whole Quran as recommended.

My first question was : How much do I read per day?

After googling it, I quickly found my answer in a YouTube video:

How to read the entire Quran in Ramadan..



Goal: 6 minutes of reading the Quran after each daily prayer.

Here's the math:
  • 6 minutes of reading = 4 pages
  • 4 pages x 5 prayers a day = 20 pages a day = One juz' of the Quran (one part)
  • There are 30 equal parts of the Quran and 30 days of Ramadhan!!

Conclusion: With only 6 minutes of Quran reading after each prayer, one can read the WHOLE Quran in ONE month.

Good luck and Ramadhan Mubarak!

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

A Guy's Guide to Girl's Crying

I really appreciated a blog post that a friend of mine wrote and I wanted to share it.
It's been one of her most googled posts:

A Guy's Guide to Girl's Crying

Food Expenditures in Different Countries

Here is an interesting forward I got today:


Germany: The Melander family of Bargteheide
Food expenditure for one week: 375.39 Euros or $500.07



United States: The Revis family of North Carolina
Food expenditure for one week $341.98




Italy: The Manzo family of Sicily
Food expenditure for one week: 214.36 Euros or $260.11



Mexico: The Casales family of Cuernavaca
Food expenditure for one week: 1,862.78 Mexican Pesos or $189.09



Poland: The Sobczynscy family of Konstancin-Jeziorna
Food expenditure for one week: 582.48 Zlotys or $151.27



Egypt: The Ahmed family of Cairo
Food expenditure for one week: 387.85 Egyptian Pounds or $68.53



Ecuador: The Ayme family of Tingo
Food expenditure for one week: $31.55



Bhutan: The Namgay family of Shingkhey Village
Food expenditure for one week: 224.93 ngultrum or $5.03



Chad: The Aboubakar family of Breidjing Camp
Food expenditure for one week: 685 CFA Francs or $1.23

My Struggle with Acne from my Teens to my Mid-Twenties

My earliest memory of my first breakouts was when I was about ten years old. I didn't notice it myself as I never paid attention to my face at that age. I was too preoccupied with schoolwork and cartoons on Saturdays. Ah the good ole days!
It was in fact my mother who started noticing them, but we did nothing about them.

Eventually, when I did notice them myself, I , like many other teens, got in the habit of popping them.

Yeah that's right, when we get that moment of privacy in our secluded area, we get rid of that juicy pimple that's been on our minds all day.

This tendency to constantly pop my zits eventually turned into an obsessive-compulsive routine. When I am stressed out or nervous, I try to pop zits that aren't even there.

Eventually I realized that popping each zit made it more inflamed and eventually left a dark spot that took forever to disappear. Even that didn't stop me from popping them.

I tried many non-prescription face cleansers designed for acne and blackheads. Nothing worked for me.

When I hit 20, I started getting some inside my nose. I know, it's very gross and disgusting! I immediately went to a doctor. He suggested that I might have adult acne. To scare me even more, he showed a picture like this one below of what adult acne (Rosacea) might turn into in a few years:



I was shocked beyond belief, until the doctor said. Don't worry, there are some treatments to prevent it from getting that bad.

I still do get those painful pimples in my nose, but only once every few months now; they eventually heal on their own.

A few months later, I went to another doctor and he had me tested for hormonal imbalance. He said if I did have this specific hormonal imbalance, then I will only be cured from the acne after I have my first baby. Fortunately, the test results were fine and I had no hormonal imbalances.

Last december, I decided to try Clinique 3 Step Solution. It was a such a bad idea.


It worked for a few days then my face started burning from the artificial and chemical ingredients. I returned it and got all my money back.

Finally I decided to use Proactiv, since it's been getting so much publicity.



It worked for a bit, but then I started getting breakouts again. I have just recently given up on it.


I decided to try and go all natural on the ingredients I use on my face. Recently I got something so cheap in the Arab world. It is called "tfal". I guess it is the equivalent of Mud Masks in the US. I bought it from the market so it looks like a rock, but when it is mixed with water or rose water, it dissolves into a light green colored paste.

I paint my face with it and let it dry. It basically absorbs what's in the pores and dries as it tightens the skin.



After about 10 minutes, I rinse it out and rub my face with a washcloth to wipe all the dirt out. I use it about three times a week now and I am definitely seeing a difference.

In addition, I bought two more products Clarins Paris "Stop Imperfections Locales:Blemish Control" and Clarins Paris "Hydra-Matte Lotion" .

This one is to hydrate my skin and minimize my pores

... and this is to lighten dark spots and heal new breakouts

I am still struggling with the compulsion to pop my zits, but it has decreased immensely, since I am concentrating on trying to keep this new routine up.

Monday, June 30, 2008

Ten Relationship Myths

I am not a big fan of Dr. Phil considering his unprofessional practice as a psychologist, but this article of his seems to have some good advice: (a friend of mine forwarded it to me)

http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/26

MYTH #1: A GREAT RELATIONSHIP DEPENDS ON A GREAT MEETING OF THE MINDS
  • You will never see things through your partner's eyes because you are two entirely different people. You are genetically, physiologically, psychologically and historically different.
  • You will not solve your relationship problems by becoming more alike in your thinking. Men and women are wired differently. Attempting to blur your fundamentally different viewpoints is unnatural and even dangerous.
  • Recognize that a relationship is far more enjoyable when you're with someone who enriches your life, not simply reflects it. Appreciate your differences.
MYTH #2: A GREAT RELATIONSHIP REQUIRES A GREAT ROMANCE
  • Yes, your life with your partner should include plenty of romance. But don't kid yourself and expect an unrealistic Hollywood fairytale. The truth is that in the real world, being in love is not like falling in love.
  • Falling in love is only the first stage of love. It's impossible to remain in that stage. A mature relationship will shift from dizzying infatuation to a deeper, more secure love.
  • Don't make the common mistake of thinking that when the initial wild passion fades you aren't in love anymore. The answer is not to start a new relationship so you can recapture that emotional high with someone else. The answer is to learn how to move on to the next stages of love for a different but richer experience.
MYTH #3: A GREAT RELATIONSHIP REQUIRES GREAT PROBLEM-SOLVING
  • Don't fall into the trap of believing that you and your partner can't be happy if you can't resolve your serious disagreements. Ninety percent of problems in a relationship are not solvable.
  • There are things that you and your partner disagree about and will continue to disagree about. Why can't you once and for all resolve these issues? Because in order to do so, one of you would have to sacrifice your values and beliefs.
  • You can simply agree to disagree and reach "emotional closure" even though you haven't reached closure on the issue.
MYTH #4: A GREAT RELATIONSHIP REQUIRES COMMON INTERESTS THAT BOND YOU TOGETHER FOREVER
  • There is nothing wrong with your relationship if you don't share common interests and activities.
  • If you and your partner are forcing yourselves to engage in common activities but the results are stress, tension and conflict, don't do it!
MYTH #5: A GREAT RELATIONSHIP IS A PEACEFUL ONE
  • Don't be afraid to argue because you think it's a sign of weakness or relationship breakdown. Even the healthiest couples argue.
  • If approached properly, arguing can actually help the relationship by (a) releasing tension and (b) instilling the sense of peace and trust that comes from knowing you can release feelings without being abandoned or humiliated.
  • Instead of worrying about how many times you argue, worry about how you argue. Here are some guidelines:

    • Don't abandon the issue and attack the worth of your partner during an argument.
    • Don't seek conflict because it's stimulating.
    • Don't pursue a take-no-prisoners approach in your arguments.
    • Don't avoid achieving emotional closure at the end of an argument.
MYTH #6: A GREAT RELATIONSHIP LETS YOU VENT ALL YOUR FEELINGS
  • Getting things off your chest might feel good, but when you blurt something out in the heat of the moment, you risk damaging your relationship permanently. Many relationships are destroyed when one partner can't forgive something that was said during uncensored venting.
  • Before you say something you might regret, bite your tongue and give yourself a moment to consider how you really feel. The things we say while we're letting loose often don't represent how we really feel and shouldn't be communicated — especially if they are potentially destructive.
MYTH #7: A GREAT RELATIONSHIP HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH SEX
  • The belief that sex is not important is a dangerous and intimacy-eroding myth. Sex provides an important time-out from the pressures of our daily lives and allows us to experience a quality level of closeness, vulnerability and sharing with our partners.
  • Sex might not be everything but it registers higher (90 percent) on the "importance scale" if it's a source of frustration in your relationship. If your sex life is unfulfilled, it becomes a gigantic issue. On the other hand, couples that have satisfying sex lives rate sex at only 10 percent on the "importance scale."
  • Don't restrict your thinking by considering sex to be something that only consists of the actual physical act. Touching, caressing, holding hands and any means by which you provide physical comfort to your partner can all be viewed as part of a fulfilling sex life.
MYTH #8: A GREAT RELATIONSHIP CANNOT SURVIVE A FLAWED PARTNER
  • Nobody's perfect. As long as your partner's quirks are non-abusive and non-destructive, you can learn to live with them.
  • Instead of focusing on your partner's shortcomings, remember the qualities that attracted you in the first place. Perhaps some of these idiosyncrasies were part of the attraction? Just because a behavior isn't mainstream, doesn't mean that it's toxic to the relationship.
  • Be careful to distinguish the difference between a partner with quirks and one with a serious problem. Serious problems that are destructive and abusive include substance abuse and mental/physical abuse. Unlike idiosyncrasies, these are not behaviors you should learn to live with.
MYTH #9: THERE IS A RIGHT WAY AND A WRONG WAY TO MAKE THE RELATIONSHIP GREAT
  • Nothing could be further from the truth. There is no definitive "right way" to be a good spouse, good parent, or to handle any relationship challenge that life throws you.
  • Do what works for you rather than following some standards you might have read in a book or heard from a well-meaning friend. If what you and your partner are doing is generating the results you want, stick with it. If both of you are comfortable with the principles that work, you can write your own rules.
  • Remember not to be rigid about the way in which you accept your partner's expressions of love. There is no "right way" for someone to love you. The fact that your partner expresses feelings differently doesn't make those feelings less genuine or of less value.
MYTH #10: YOUR RELATIONSHIP CAN BECOME GREAT ONLY WHEN YOU STRAIGHTEN YOUR PARTNER OUT
  • Don't fall into the trap of believing that if you could change your partner, your relationship would be better. You are, at the very least, jointly accountable for the relationship.
  • Let go of the childlike notion that falling in love means finding someone who will be responsible for your happiness. You need to take responsibility for your own happiness.
  • If your relationship is distressed, the most important person for you to change might be yourself. Once you identify the payoffs you are subconsciously seeking with destructive behavior, you can choose to remove them from your life.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

My First Steps towards Hijabifying Myself :)

As a muslimah, I am trying to dress more modestly but at the same time more fashionably. Yesterday, at the mall, I fell in love with New York and Company. They had so many elegant long sleeve tunics that cover the behinds ;). I made sure they were light colored to suit the summer season.

I'd like to share a few samples of my new wardrobe:

The Manhattan Chino Capri - Solid looks too short for a muslimah but considering that I am a petite size, it reached my ankles and thus it fit perfectly. It's very comfortable and not too tight fitting if you get the right size.




The City Style Caftan - Coastal Swirl is slightly transparent, which will require a simple white shirt underneath. Its colors are very lively and calls for a nice breezy afternoon.






The City Style Roll Sleeve Tunic - Solid is simple, elegant, and very comfortable. The belt does not come with it. In fact, it looks better without the belt; I also personally think that it looks more modest without it. Depending on the jewelery, it can look either professional or casual. The sleeves are rolled up but they can be rolled down to cover the arms fully.



I do not cover my hair yet, but with baby steps, I will inshAllah wear it eventually. The hair shall be the last step.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

A Powerful Quote from "Shantaram"


“It took me a long time and most of the world to learn what I know about love and fate and the choices we make, but the heart of it came to me in an instant, while I was chained to a wall and being tortured. I realised, somehow, through the screaming of my mind, that even in that shackled, bloody helplessness, I was still free: free to hate the men who were torturing me, or to forgive them. It doesn’t sound like much, I know. But in the flinch and bite of the chain, when it’s all you’ve got, that freedom is an universe of possibility. And the choice you make between hating and forgiving, can become the story of your life.” -- Shantaram

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Argumentation and Superiority and Their Harm ...

I am often disturbed by some people's behavior with others. Many individuals pride on being compassionate and caring, yet when they feel the need to feed their ego, all they concentrate on is imposing their superiority.

Why is it, that in the American society, arrogance and argumentation (to show one's superiority) are highly praised? (Have you watched politicians argue lately? ... atrocious!!)

These character traits have become so common and accepted, that many have numbed their hearts from worrying about hurting another person's feelings in the process; apparently, imposing one's argument is more important!!

The truth of the matter is that arguing about one's belief with another person is not as admirable as avoiding hurting that same person's feelings! If trying to impose one's opinion on someone will do damage, then one must sustain from such argumentation until one can do it without causing any harm.

Here are some quotes and hadiths, which assured me that such behavior is not normal!

Do not dispute anyone in any matter as far as possible. For in argumentation lies much harm and its evil is greater than its benefit. [Imam al Ghazali]


The Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) said:
“The most despicable amongst persons in the eye of Allah is one who tries to fall into dispute with others (for nothing but only to display his knowledge and power of argumentation).”
[Sahih Muslim]

Narrated Abu Huraira

Allah's Apostle said, "Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day should talk what is good or keep quiet, and whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day should not hurt (or insult) his neighbor; and whoeverbelieves in Allah and the Last Day, should entertain his guest generously.


It is a glorious thing to be indifferent to suffering, but only to one's own. Suffering is the seed from which compassion grows. The salvation of the world is in man's suffering.

It is unwise to be too sure of one's wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err.

Mockery is the weapon of those who have no other, it is the first and last argument of fools, it is the language of the devil.


Scoff not at the natural defects of any which are not in their own power to amend. It is cruel to beat a cripple with his own crutches.

Always do right; this will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

No man has a right to do what he pleases, except when he pleases to do right.

Good manners are made up of petty sacrifices. It is not what we take up, but what we give up, that makes us rich.

Sarcasm is the language of the devil, it is jealousy in bold disguise, it is to leave a sting within a brother's heart.

A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults.

Prudent, cautious self-control is wisdom's root. The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.

Every quarrel begins in nothing and ends in a struggle for supremacy. In quarrelling the truth is always lost.

A long dispute means that both parties are wrong. When we quarrel, how we wish we had been blameless!

*I got the majority of these quotes from Sister Hafiza Iffath Hasan, who compiles great quotes daily on her blog Lessons of the Day . *

Saturday, March 15, 2008

A poem by Nizar Qabbani


تسألني حبيبتي
"ماالفرق ما بيني و ما بين السما؟
الفرق ما بينهما
انك ان ضحكت يا حبيبتي
انسى السما...


--نزار قباني

My lover asks me:
"What is the difference between me and the sky?"
The difference, my love,
Is that when you laugh
I forget about the sky.

--Nizar Qabbani



Sunday, March 9, 2008

First Blog!!

This is my first blog ever!! I have a big fear of writing and I am hoping that by writing for fun, rather than for classes, that my fear will slowly diminish. Among many topics I want to write about are:

- Religion --specifically Islam :)
- Eating disorders -- Having "healed" from it, I want to reflect on its side-effects and causes.
- Relationships -- What's healthy and what's not healthy. ALSO, a girl's brain vs. a guy's brain!
- Books -- I prefer non-fiction. If it's fiction then it has to be realistic!
- Homosexuality
- Pakistani/Indian culture -- I love the food, clothes, and the Urdu/Hindi language!
- Languages -- I know Arabic, French, English, Spanish, Urdu, and a bit of German.
- Good Bollywood movies and other international movies -- not too much of the cheesy ones.
- Poetry of Nizar Qabbani--an Arab Poet
- Good inspirational quotes -- if you have any, please share!

Here we go!